I was journaling something sweet about my two-year-old daughter Briani the other day when she suddenly stood in front of the bedroom fan looking at me. In just seconds a rancid smell of caca hit my nose prompting me to notice that she not only had her diapers by her ankles but that her hands and neck were stained with poop.
“Ha, ha!” she said mischeviously as I rushed to her side to contain the poop and told her not to move. A quick scan of the nearby floor and hallway revealed a major case “of poopizide.”
In what is now officially the most disgusting thing that any of my three kids has ever done, Briani quietly and apparently happily “painted” our hallway’s walls with her brown stuff. To make matters worse, Briani soon started to pee on the floor in the same spot where I told her to wait.
Lucky for her she’s so cute because what I really wanted to do was to scream. Instead, I just smiled inside and realized this is something I’m never going to forget. My 10-year-old Jonathan once tasted a piece of his poop and Elena once ate half of a small dead roach but this was crazier and even more disgusting than those.
After the poopizide was done I gave Briani a much-needed bath and I waited for my wife to get home so she could see what our daughter had done. We laughed, took some photos and realized this is the joy of parenthood.
In the spirit of crazy parenting moments I’m giving away a cool pocket video camera to the person who can tell us the most disgusting, funny thing that any of their children ever did when they were young. PapiBlogger will pick three finalists and put them up for an online vote online. Entries must be posted as a comment to this story. The deadline is November 10.
P.S. My wife used the Lysol wipes to clean the walls. Those things worked like a charm.